Everyone thinks Brad Pitt has it great because he married Angelina Jolie. I think he has it terrible, because when Angelina Jolie is giving you a blow job, what do you tip your head back and think of to help you finish? You have nothing left — just Jesus on a polar bear in the middle of the snow, saying, ‘You greedy motherfucker, I’ve got nothing for you.’
John Mayer, 09-21-2006 (via apsies) (via allthiscanbeyours) (via ktroseknows) (via 8tania) (via babydeer) (via sharpless) (via magnetical)